Quote from el pibe :

you can also say to her '' ich bin das furher '' =P



( this post wasnt meant to be serious.... )

When you mean "Ich bin der Fuehrer" (With Umlaut), then you're not being funny.

@Bossted: lolwut.

"Du habst eine katoffel in deine fürsprech"

That's the sentence you need, no need for more

Learning German 3-rd year and sadly dont speak it very good.
Just tell her that if she comes to England she needs to speak English :P
Just insult her in English, she cant understand you anyways. And dont forget to blame her for everything bad that Germans have done.

Quote from The Very End :

"Du habst eine katoffel in deine fürsprech"

That's the sentence you need, no need for more

Potato?

Quote from rediske :

...teach her English as soon as possible - German sucks...

Well if that German sucks then enjoy it

Quote from A long, long time ago :

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!

Quote from Bean0 :

I think Clarkson wrote this.

Quote from Bean0 :

Lol at the last few lines. But this is actually how the most german people SPEAK english

Quote from The Very End :

"Du habst eine katoffel in deine fürsprech"

That's the sentence you need, no need for more

That doesn't make any sense at all...
You havest a potato in your ?? ?

i thought "tschüss" was more an Austrian thing

German is an official language here lol Only like 30000 ppl near the german border actually speak it.
So now the whole country has to learn it in school.

Well, I can speak Dutch to Germans and vice versa and most of the time we will understand 50% of what's being said. Only different thing is that Germans use faar to much verbs in one sentence.
Not sure, but I recall seeing Schwimming Pool in a German book I had. How easy can that be =P. Also Schwimmbad and Zwembad don't differ that much in speach, Schwimmbad is just Germanized! (or is it Schwimmbat or batt?)

Ich liebe sauerkraut inn der Österreich

Well, whatever you do...

DON'T MENTION THE WAR!

Der blitzkrieg!? Ich bin ein kriegsmariner. Ich wurde belästigt, aber mein Kommandant sagte, dass es meine Einführung war und das ihm auch eingeleitet worden war.

LOL dont metion the war i did and she got in a mood cos we kick ur ***

Nonsense².

Quote :

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

Funnily, that exact same thing happened to the german language 13 years ago...

Quote from ColeusRattus :

Funnily, that exact same thing happened to the german language 13 years ago...

Tbh it changes every half year or so. Just like Delphin or Delfin :grumpy:
But after some time you don´t really care how its written and do it as you learnd it in good old school time

Du hast einen hund gebomst? all i know...

Quote from BastianB :

Tbh it changes every half year or so. Just like Delphin or Delfin :grumpy:
But after some time you don´t really care how its written and do it as you learnd it in good old school time

I think both is still possible.

Quote from Intermediate07 :

Nice thread here

As useless as Germany itself.

Nah, j/k, where would we be without lederhosen?

in the other 15 federal states.

Quote from Biohazard :

in the other 15 federal states.

Nobody needs Bayern anyway.

Quote from zeugnimod :

Nobody needs Bayern anyway.

Bayern (=Bavaria for the English Guys) should get independet, or even better, join Austria.

Hah! You Austrians must accept thousands of our stylish skiing idiots each year! And this is just because you haven't found a way to take money from us germans without having us invading your country!

However, there is one nation which achieved this: Switzerland!

When I'm home from work next week I'll teach you some proper tschörman :-)

gruß

ze butz