The online racing simulator
When life gives you lemons, and trading them for beer is socially unnacceptable...
...what do you do?

I won't go into details, I'm sure none of you care to hear it all anyway, but basically the last 3 weeks or so have been the worst ones of my life. I'm at the point now where all the things are manifesting themselves as physical illness (lucky I'm in a suite in residence this year, I've got my own bathroom).

Taking long walks through the wilderness don't seem to help my state of mind anymore, the food here is definitely not helping at all (especially on the health front...) and this black cloud over my head won't leave me alone, no matter how much I yell at it.

What do you guys do to calm yourselves when in extremely difficult situations mentally, emotionally, and physically?
#2 - robt
although you say none of us care to hear it all, maybe letting it out will help. just getting it off your chest may relax you.
Taking up a new sport or hobby is always a good option I find, one of the reasons I took up Photography. Go grab a camera and get creative, you might like it!
Quote from MAGGOT :What do you guys do to calm yourselves when in extremely difficult situations mentally, emotionally, and physically?

First option is always call a good friend. Just talking about stuff helps a lot.

When I was pretty messed-up mentally for a while, probably due to copious amounts of mindbending drugs, and I used to get these weird panic attack-like periods, I found that playing bass helped a lot. I think it was because it was something I could do without really thinking about it - an activity a bit like meditation I suppose. Maybe you could find something like that to do.
Count your blessings.

May sound a bit "simple", but it's a good method for me.

Think of all the good things that you have in your life. Think of all the things you have, that many others don't (a roof above your head, food, a "safe" life, family, friends, nature, etc). And you will come to realize that you should be happy.

People forget to see the "little" things, which are the big and important ones in fact. So sometimes you have to sit down in peace, and try to remind yourself a little of those.

Even if life kicks you in the face... keep your head up. Don't give up the fight, and think of all the people who don't have an easy life either. There are many of them.

A good book about this...
Paulo Coelho - Warrior of light (not sure about the exact english name of the title)

Quote from robt :although you say none of us care to hear it all, maybe letting it out will help. just getting it off your chest may relax you.

I've already been forced to tell some of my friends; one of which threatened to beat me if I didn't spill the beans. I love my friends, they care. I suppose that's one bright spark.

Quote from mcintyrej :Taking up a new sport or hobby is always a good option I find, one of the reasons I took up Photography. Go grab a camera and get creative, you might like it!

I've recently taken up squash, sorta, but the time to play it is the problem there. Especially since having a really fun time relies on having a second player to actually play with; and both friends who play it are just as busy as I am, usually at different times, too. I try to do a light workout twice a day to release some physical energy, which is helping a little bit, though.

If I had the money for a decent camera I'd love to buy one. Not even just for creative photography, but for racing pics too. My point-n-shoot camera really doesn't cut it. Maybe after Christmas, depending on how work goes; if I still have my job after this week.

I suppose it's worth mentioning that I do, in fact, live on a College/University campus and have extremely limited time. Campus location is a problem, too; there's literally nothing to do in this area of Toronto, aside from going to the horse-racing track. I can't afford to gamble, though.

[EDIT]
Quote from thisnameistaken :First option is always call a good friend. Just talking about stuff helps a lot.

When I was pretty messed-up mentally for a while, probably due to copious amounts of mindbending drugs, and I used to get these weird panic attack-like periods, I found that playing bass helped a lot. I think it was because it was something I could do without really thinking about it - an activity a bit like meditation I suppose. Maybe you could find something like that to do.

I've always wanted to take up guitar or bass. Such a thing would be a perfect thing in residence, too, since it requires very little space. I'll see what I can do about securing an instrument.

Quote from jibber :Count your blessings.

May sound a bit "simple", but it's a good method for me.

Always a good idea, in good and bad times. I continually find myself focusing on the bad things, and rarely on the good. I guess that's the first thing I need to change.
Guitar playing is seriously something worth looking into. The main reason I picked one up was to 'escape reality' but after a while it just turned into a vent of the bad things in life, and a boost in the good things. It lets you expand emotions, store them in your instrument.

I'm probably the youngest one posting in this thread, but I must say, do NOT turn to drugs. I tried it, and honestly it feels great, I'm not gonna lie. But after a while you realize just how deep you dug yourself... You start getting dependent, things start becoming harder to feat, your motivation crumbles and your general 'tone' will drop through the floor.

Talking with people you get along with helps too, and I don't mean any deep emotional conversations, just nice friendly chats with old friends really helps ease your mind.

But I think the main thing to consider is point of view. Take a look at the life around you, you'll realize just how good you have it compared to some others. Maybe not around your campus, but read about stuff going on around Toronto, it will shock you. Some of the things people have to deal with daily is just insane.

A lot of us here are willing to help you with your doom cloud, and feel free to drop me a line anytime if you must, I'm always up for a chat.

Keep up the positive attitude and things will start to get better, we'll all here for you
~Bryan~
Like a lot of the trippers above, I find music is great therapy so I'd agree with learning an instrument - especially one you can bounce around with, unlike a harpsichord. I love listening to music to chill, with something like the Miles Davis album Kind Of Blue + some decent red wine (but not too much). Fortunately, twice a week I get to scream everything out through a microphone at rehearsals or shows. Since I'm the only one who writes lyrics for my band I can say pretty much whatever I want as loud as I want, which can turn jams into group therapy I'm a crap guitarist but sometimes I like to crank the Strat up anyway and blast out some Faith No More or Radiohead and wail like my neighbours can't hear me If you do learn to play something, I totally recommend finding or forming a band. Won't matter if you suck because everyone does at first, just hanging out with like-minded buds and making some fearsome goddam racket is the best damn fun imaginable

When rocking out isn't possible I like to ride my mountainbike or bmx and really push it. Music or exercise (hell, even housework) seems to work for me - getting a good sweat up and having to focus on what you're doing rather than what you're thinking is a great head-clearer. All the best :up:
Actually, yeah, singing has a pretty weird effect on me - it can totally change my mood sometimes. I like to pick good, melodic tunes to sing along to while doing housework or whatever (Cud, Elvis Costello, Joe Jackson, Ben Folds, Kinks, etc.) and it really raises my spirits. Try to pick something you can really ham up!
Elvis Costello, shit yeah :up: Y'know what livens me up though? Wailing along with The Darkness I can't play those cock-rock guitar solos but I give Justin's squeal a bloody good shot
Thanks for the input, guys. I'll see what I can do about the guitar. I'd quite like to try my hand at fabricating my own, actually. It'd probably sound like a yak's flatulence, but it would be an interesting project; I DO have a month off for Christmas coming up in 5 or 6 weeks...

For temporary relief, I can just put on a couple episodes of Top Gear. Always makes me laugh.
It's really difficult to give advice when you're not aware of any of the details, but, as the guys have said, try to look for the positive things in life, find something to distract yourself from your on-going situation.

I'm guessing most of the older guys in here have been through bad times at some stage in their life (i know i've been through some really heavy duty shit in my time) But, we got through it, most things are temporary, and even if they're not, there's always a silver lining in every cloud. The trick is, finding that ray of hope and holding on to it. There's a saying i was told a few years ago "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger". It may be obtuse, but it's helped me on more than one occassion. And if you find yourself up shit creek, keep paddling, even if you dont have a paddle, if you look hard enough, you'll always find something to get you going.

But whatever you do, you must, i repeat must watch this week Top Gear. An absolute classic !, I was literally in tears (laughing) with Clarkson's road test of the little blue car. If you can find a torrent of the whole show then do it (try finalgear.com in a few days time)

Be happy, things are never quite as bad as you think they are.
By the sound of it I can pretty much rule out that somebody close to you died. I rather guess that you either broke up with your girlfriend or have messed up at university big time, which I both managed to do already in my short lifetime ^^. I rather think it's the first option though.

But no matter what, your next few weeks to months will generally suck, so just get prepared for tough times. They will pass though, and you will emerge from it a good deal wiser than you were before.

Also, while it usually helps to drink a glass or two with a pal, DON'T start doing it now if you are not into drinking. Same goes for other drugs. While you do escape from reality and it does ease your pain, you're even more likely to get psychically addicted to it, as both booze and drugs don't solve problems, they just make you numb, and create a shitload of other problems you'd have to deal with.

Also, when you are really down and are considering suicide, which would be no shame to admit, as I guess almost everyone had done so with various degrees of determination, think of the people who love you and of the consequences such a permanent solution to temporary problems would have for them.

Now what I usually do (well, gladly NOT usually, but you get my meaning), when I'm down is sport, as you mentioned already, allthough not team sports or sports where you are dependant on someone else. Now I am not talking about going for a stroll in fresh air (which too helps), but serious, exhausting endurance sport. I then go running, biking or swimming without setting a target or goal, but just to the point of complete and utter exhaustion, almost to the point you're going to vomit. It's advisable to have a friend (or good public transport) to bring you home afterwards though. That has several advantages:
Most importantly I start getting into kind of a trance or medidational state of mind after just a few minutes of excercise. In that state, propably induced by the always repeating steps and deep breathing, I ususally get my problems in a better perspective and can think about them calmly, and even if I am not going to solve them, I'm going to find them more bearable afterwards.
Also it's quite more healthy than boozing, doing drugs or eating overly much in frustration, while still satisfying the need to "destroy" oneself.
As I am not a very sporty person, it fills me with feelng of achievement and victory because I did something that I deemed way above my abilites, like running 15 kilometers or swimming for an hour straight.
And, the last advantage: just like most drugs, the exhaustion will trigger you glands to flush your blood circuit with endorphines, making you literally high.

Now, if my guess is correct that your problem is induced by a girl, a last advice: don't see her or talk to her. While it definately hurts to absolutely lose contact, you'll probably need it to get over with quickly. When my first long (meaning oover a year) relationship broke up, I was quite stupidly still seeing her almost every week, as we were best friends before the relationship. Quite unsurprisingly, I was still in love with her, and as I saw her so often I couldn't get over it. Especially as she started complaining to me about her numerous new boyfriends she had in quick succession after me, which made me hope that she would come back. Thus I spent a time longer than our relationship hoping and dreaming and most of all depressed and frustrated, until I couldn't bear it any longer and completely dismissed her. It was then a matter of weeks till I felt better and started daitng other girls, which I wasn't able to as long as I had clung to her.

So conclusively: heads up, it'll get better
I know what hell is. It's not a place or somewhere you go after you die. It's right here on this Earth and it's an emotional state of being. The darkest chapters of my life would make for an unbelieveable soap opera, and put me in a place of personal tormet for years, but it did get better.

In the last few weeks I also descovered that heaven too is a place on Earth, and it's blooming fantastic.

I dont regret anything i've done, or anything that's happened to me along the way. I would not change a thing because the fact is that I got here and not how much pain there was on the way.

Incidentally the heaven is a place on Earth thing does also meen that even in heaven you have to go to work and do the whole 9-5 thing, which is pretty sucky - and i've got to go and get ready to do that right now... Adios.
I'm so going to have to fly out there and get you rather drunken... and remember to send you story into the East Enders writers, they'd love it

I've taken up all sorts of hobbies in the past to get over things. Some more costly than others though. The most fun has been airsoft as once a week I would run around a field/army training camp shoot the crap out of a bunch of guys with little plastic balls. Or going to the gym twice a week, and getting buff.

Oh and try cutting off specific people for a while so you can get back on your feet, otherwise once you start to get back up they will just kick you on your arse again.
i do a bit of yoga, but when i was about 10, i just used to eat and eat, made me feel good , also, LFS makes you feel good, go on a server with loads of people, just talk to them about some coool stuff
Harjun, it'd be better to find some REAL LIFE freinds, and talk to some REAL people. After all, real people you can see thier emotions and so on. If someone is feeling down for whatever reason, I think staying in is a very bad thing to do.

>_>
If I'm having a bad day, feeling depressed or down, I just talk to Tom.
the best thing i found is to get as far away as possible from where youre at and spend that time there to get a new perspective on things ... obviously that will require a functional brain which rules out any kind of drugs to get there

either way if you come up with anything that really works that preferably doesnt involve learning to play an instrument pls drop me a line
Become a snob! No seriously! Every time you go outside, make mental notes on how stupid/ugly/smelly/idiotic people are, focussing on their appearence, actions, accent/voice etc etc. You'll soon realise that, no matter how badly things seem to be going for you, the majority of people are a LOT worse.

Plus it's very funny watching people.
I hit the track.

Focused, rewarding, exhausting so I can sleep afterwards, noisy, creative, involving, dangerous.

The perfect cheer up.


That or spend 3 hours cooking the best meal you can think of, and eating it infront of a the "planet earth" box set.
A few things that could immediately help...

* Take up long distance jogging.

* Change your music around, seek new stuff from different genres, even ones you haven't considered before. Some new music can help lift you into an alternative perspective of mind. If you want to feel more peaceful, listen to peaceful music. If you want to feel inspired, seek out something new and interesting to you.

* Take a cold shower. Instant mood changer- there's probably no easier or quicker way to get yourself out of a funk.

Good luck bro
Quote from tristancliffe :Become a snob! No seriously! Every time you go outside, make mental notes on how stupid/ugly/smelly/idiotic people are, focussing on their appearence, actions, accent/voice etc etc. You'll soon realise that, no matter how badly things seem to be going for you, the majority of people are a LOT worse.

Great attitude you have there...
Quote from jibber :Great attitude you have there...

Have you read any of his other posts?

I suppose one outlet for me is coding, as if I get deep into something I become completely unaware of anything going on around me or in my life. I usually notice the clock a bit later and realise I should have cooked dinner/gone to bed/got up already. Hmm, maybe not the best solution but certainly passes the time and makes me feel productive.
Quote from tristancliffe :Become a snob! No seriously! Every time you go outside, make mental notes on how stupid/ugly/smelly/idiotic people are, focussing on their appearence, actions, accent/voice etc etc.

Good advice...

Start here

1

FGED GREDG RDFGDR GSFDG