How about a stick of dynamite? When the umbrella falls over, a button triggers some sort of ignition system that blows it up. There's nothing left of the umbrella, but it's owner would then be dead, so it wouldn't matter!

Quote from chanoman315 :

ok.... you're definetely not from spain... or the drugs option..

Urm, yes he is?
Im portoguese and the two languages have their simularities and i can understand that So either he's talking brazilian, portoguese, or spanish.


@ Lerts:

Its a good idea, just kinda pointless? If that was put in a pen, and i like to write with my pen sideways its going to keep correcting itself and moving. Could ruin my already bad handwriting? Although on a positive side it could always fix my bad handwriting?



Edit: I just noticed the guy i quated is all the way on the first page, sorry. I thought it was only 1 page long
Whoot Lerts Retard Handwriting Fixer 2000 FTW!!!

One page lerts thread? Nevah!

Quote from dougie-lampkin :

One page lerts thread? Nevah!

Yeahhhh, are you saying as soon as he clicked the post thread button it had two pages instantly?
I think not:P

And i never got to the bottom of the page so i didnt see that it said more then one page. Only after i posted i noticed i was on page 1 of 4.

Quote from wheel4hummer :

How about a stick of dynamite? When the umbrella falls over, a button triggers some sort of ignition system that blows it up. There's nothing left of the umbrella, but it's owner would then be dead, so it wouldn't matter!

Has to be. the most. stupid idea, ever!LOL , but better than the OP's brolly that could'nt be faced into headwinds or crosswinds, one would have to resemble a turtle and crouch down as the bloody thing stays level???
ants:

Quote from Migz :

Urm, yes he is?
Im portoguese and the two languages have their simularities and i can understand that So either he's talking brazilian, portoguese, or spanish.


@ Lerts:

Its a good idea, just kinda pointless? If that was put in a pen, and i like to write with my pen sideways its going to keep correcting itself and moving. Could ruin my already bad handwriting? Although on a positive side it could always fix my bad handwriting?



Edit: I just noticed the guy i quated is all the way on the first page, sorry. I thought it was only 1 page long
Whoot Lerts Retard Handwriting Fixer 2000 FTW!!!

I had a pen which had a weight where you could rest the pen in, it would always be vertical when you had in in that thing.

Why not just put a Christmas tree stand on the end of your umbrella handle?

If you want people to look at you in amazement, that should do the trick.

Umbrellas are for obnoxious people who are scared of getting a little wet, or don't realize that there are better ways to stay dry. They are also a safety hazard: people injure themselves when they fall because they don't have both hands free, and they reduce visibility. Do they use them in the military? do they use them in the postal service? did Gene Kelly use one? do any other professionals who might end up working in the rain use them? And they tip over all the time.

all right thank a lot guys i finally got it:

http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e222/raaaid/magic.jpg

as you can see the minimum potential energy it can have is being vertical because while vertical downforce of the piston beats atmospheric pressure so it goes down when vertical

but if it leans downforce of the piston reduces so atmospheric pressure beats it and it rises

so the lowest posible position of the piston, the biggest weight, is while it is vertical if it leans it will tend to rise , and we all know weight tend to go down

do you think this can work, its actually quite easy to build so i could get to sell magic umbrellas built by myself finally

Lerts you've clearly given this some thought, but instead of thinking about potential energy and downforce, just look at your picture for a moment. If that starts to topple there is nothing within the central mass that is going to stop it falling, no matter how low or high that weight is. There's a reason people use gyroscopes to stabilise things.

This, like all your other suggestions, just amplifies the falling action. Give up, man.

only aplying momentums can lead to wrong conclusions as here:

http://es.youtube.com/watch?v=j8mRstDeZCM

the thing doesnt work because the center of gravity remains at the same height, things only go from high potential energy to low pot energy or what is the same moving the cog down

my ideas got me confused, im not sure it will work but i m not sure either it wont but consider this redutio ad absurdum:

i have a 1 m2 weightless tube as long as i want, when vertical it goes to vacuum space, i put inside a piston of 10001kg, so it beats atmospheric pressure by 1 kg

i have it vertical with vacuum on the top, the piston in the bottom and the tube vertical

i lean it 30ºholding it by the bottom, downforce of the piston will now be half so the piston will go up doing work because atmospheric pressure force is double than piston downforce

now i hold the tube by the top and let it go vertical, downforce of the piston will beat atmospheric pressure by 1 kg so it will go down producing 1 kg for every meter that goes down work

so it would produce work when holded by the bottom and the weight going up and then would produce work again holded by the top with the weight coming down, closing a cycle of 2 steps in each of which theres a production of energy

so supposing the momentum leans the tube i could get free energy just as the youtube link, this cant be right the umbrella can only get self standing or free energy is posible

unless im missing something, any help guys?

btw why should i give up, thinking is amusing and this is a nice thing to think about

http://www.yankodesign.com/ind ... brella-by-hironao-tsuboi/
someone beat me but still i want it to look like magic

I'd love to try and help, but you lost me when you said that 10001kg only just beats atmospheric pressure by 1kg :S

yes atmospheric pressure is 10000 kg per square meter

if the tube has a section of 1 squared m and the piston weights 10001kg the piston will go constantly down with a force of 1 kg constantly

but if you lean it 30º downforce will be 5000.5kg with wich atm pressure will beat that and the piston will raise

exclusively from the point of view of potential energy of the piston theres no doubt it will tend to verticality, but theres something more: the potential energy of vacuum is lost

Have you considered upthrust, the upward force a body feels when immersed in a fluid? Atmospheric pressure isn't just downward. And how come it's easy to pick a sheet of metal up when it's on the ground (i.e. no air, and no pressure underneath) if it's got 10 tonnes acting on it?

I think your understanding of physics is flawed. You also have an unhealthy (and wrong) obsession with potential energy.

I'm waiting for the "I built a Perpetual Motion Machine" thread ...

here it go:

im at 10 m depth of a swimming pool at the top of which theres vacuum, so the pressure at 10 m depth will be 1 bar or 1 kg per squared cm

this means that if i have a vertical tube closed in the top and open in the bottom of 1 cm2 surface, a piston of 1 kg and 1g will beat pressure and go down creating vacuum

lets suppose it downed 1 m, it means i have a meter of vacuum by spending a potential energy of lowering 1 kg and a gram 1 m

but this means the level of water raised 1 liter of water or 1 kg because of the created vacuum on the bottom, so now i have 1 kg raised 10 m, the level of water

so by lowering 1 kg, the piston, 1 m you get a kg of water raised 10m

any help?

edit:
"i have a meter of vacuum by spending a potential energy of lowering 1 kg and a gram 1 m"

1 m of vacuum of 1 cm2 is 100grams, so i lower 1 kg 1 m and lift 100 grams 10 m"

well i just found out there are 2 potential energies, the piston, and the level of atmosphere that rises and lowers as vacuum expands or contracts

in fact as one is gained the other is lost in exact the same proportion, the piston lowers with the same energy than the atmospheric level rises

but my supposition is that that vacuum is not complete, it must have some air inside, and that litle air being the rest of the parameters indifferent should fight to expand but im not sure that would be enough to create a righting arm

i kept your advice of looking at mmoments and i got a working gimball

a balance that has the cog above the axle:

http://i40.photobucket.com/albums/e222/raaaid/level.jpg

Guys, I've solved it.

1) Buy Helium-filled Balloon
2) Tie string to balloon
3) tie other end of string to side of umbrella wishing to keep upright
4) Voila.

im not the only weirdo thinking of these things:

http://www.masjuguetes.com/wp- ... 008/04/circus-balance.jpg

this idea works cause has the cog below the axle, but my last idea which must work(only have to aply momentums to see) has the cog above the axle, not above eneough as to make a magic umbrella but above, i suppose the idea once know its posible can be improved till i can make a magic umbrella

Quote from lerts :

im not the only weirdo thinking of these things:

http://www.masjuguetes.com/wp- ... 008/04/circus-balance.jpg

this idea works cause has the cog below the axle, but my last idea which must work(only have to aply momentums to see) has the cog above the axle, not above eneough as to make a magic umbrella but above, i suppose the idea once know its posible can be improved till i can make a magic umbrella

Hehe, your not weird mate, just special
(and yes, I meant that positive! )

i got it upside down before heres more clear, i hope somebody sees this balances:

http://i40.photobucket.com/alb ... 2/raaaid/rightbalance.jpg