Since you've uncovered my insidious plan, you might as well enjoy me dying first... I wonder if the disaster also takes DST into account, 'cause in that case I'm really doomed...
Crazy Frog Crazy Cat will save the day lmao
Wait a minute.. is it on midnight between the 20th and 21st or 21st and 22nd? If it isn't the latter I only have an hour to live 
It's 24 past midnight and I'm still here.
A god has existed since before the dawn of time, but she (á la Dogma) doesn't have grasp of time zones?
"Meanwhile in H. Camping's home..."
"Oh no I made a mathematical error again, just like in 1994."
Oh I'm still here. Well, that's christianity out the window.... again.
Just a quick skim on Camping.
"from the Bible in John 21:1-14 the disciples are about 200 cubits out from the shore on the Sea of Galilee. Harold Camping has taken that figure of 200 cubits and decided that it actually means 2000 years between the first and second coming of Christ.[2] Not only has Harold Camping inserted his own meaning into a minor detail in the Bible, he has changed the number from 200 to 2000 and the units from cubits[3] to years. With "reasoning" like this it is amazing that anyone has taken Harold Camping seriously. To learn more about Harold Camping's teachings here are some informative links, the Institute for Biblical & Scientific Studies and the ApologeticsIndex."
cultwatch
"from the Bible in John 21:1-14 the disciples are about 200 cubits out from the shore on the Sea of Galilee. Harold Camping has taken that figure of 200 cubits and decided that it actually means 2000 years between the first and second coming of Christ.[2] Not only has Harold Camping inserted his own meaning into a minor detail in the Bible, he has changed the number from 200 to 2000 and the units from cubits[3] to years. With "reasoning" like this it is amazing that anyone has taken Harold Camping seriously. To learn more about Harold Camping's teachings here are some informative links, the Institute for Biblical & Scientific Studies and the ApologeticsIndex."
cultwatch
Wonder whats his "excuse" or explanation will be...
I hate god botherers.
There is no god, jehova, allah or whatever else a bullshit brainwashing religion wants to call him/her/it.
Thats my opinion anyway
There is no god, jehova, allah or whatever else a bullshit brainwashing religion wants to call him/her/it.
Thats my opinion anyway
sounds like hes been smoking a big jeffery. and of course when this turns out to be shite. we will all carry on our lives as normal. with one very red faced pensioner.
Well I just got back from the gates of heaven, I had a bit of a tiff with St Peter because he didnt like me taking the piss out of his dress, so they've decided to cancel the rest of the Rapture.
Anyway whilst up there I met the J.C. - he says he's doing fine. I asked him "where's yo bitch" but it turns out that Jesus loves everyone, including men, so he still hasnt married his whore*. I had no idea Jesus was so gay**, I bet that's going to piss off a lot of Christians.
*Biblical definition: I in no way believe that a woman who has sex out of marriage is a whore, but in this case it seemed approrpiate to use the bibical description of womanhood.
**Bibical definition: Jesus "knew" a lot of men and loves everyone. Modern definition: Gay.
To be honest it's about time we had another apocalypse, we havn't had one in a year or so, and there hasn't been a Christian apocalypse I can recall since the mid 90's - although I dont keep track of the Jehova's Witnesses continual claims of imminent armageddon so I may have missed some.
Unfortunately the regularity of these events and their failure to unfold does not seem to sway those who believe in them. Then again, if cast iron proof had any effect on the religious then there wouldn't be religion in the first place.
Anyway must dash, it's almost 2pm which is when I must pray to the Invisible Pink Unicorn in the sky.
Anyway whilst up there I met the J.C. - he says he's doing fine. I asked him "where's yo bitch" but it turns out that Jesus loves everyone, including men, so he still hasnt married his whore*. I had no idea Jesus was so gay**, I bet that's going to piss off a lot of Christians.
*Biblical definition: I in no way believe that a woman who has sex out of marriage is a whore, but in this case it seemed approrpiate to use the bibical description of womanhood.
**Bibical definition: Jesus "knew" a lot of men and loves everyone. Modern definition: Gay.
To be honest it's about time we had another apocalypse, we havn't had one in a year or so, and there hasn't been a Christian apocalypse I can recall since the mid 90's - although I dont keep track of the Jehova's Witnesses continual claims of imminent armageddon so I may have missed some.
Unfortunately the regularity of these events and their failure to unfold does not seem to sway those who believe in them. Then again, if cast iron proof had any effect on the religious then there wouldn't be religion in the first place.
Anyway must dash, it's almost 2pm which is when I must pray to the Invisible Pink Unicorn in the sky.
Amen sister.
When that is said, I feel sorry for myself to not beeing able to get drunk / take a propper wank before the world is ending
When that is said, I feel sorry for myself to not beeing able to get drunk / take a propper wank before the world is ending
You just don't understand... We already are in Heaven!!!
If that's true I feel scammed. The heaven's no good place x.x
but oooooo heaven is a place on earth.
The world simply can't end today... I still have a few days of residual leave. I can't waste that!
Army isn't heaven. Heaven is the outside world.
5 minutes left here....whattodowhattodo....
One man = christianity...
You really are a smart girl.
One man = christianity...
You really are a smart girl.
Christianity = religion
out the window = it failed, it was wrong.
Now go sit in the corner.
Christianity hasn't failed dumbo. That idiot has.
I'm ALIVE!
Oh noez
(87 posts, started )
FGED GREDG RDFGDR GSFDG